Bradon's Quotes
"Fuck you mosquito, you can't suck my blood"
“I wanna be my own depression.”
“He wanted to make love with my bullets”
"My smoothie is all liquidy"
"We are the cause of world hunger"
“I like my limbs. They’re functional.”
“Strawshank redemption.”
I was ready to be an asshole.”
"I can't tell if it's a threat or a turn on"
"i murdered him funnily"
“I’ve got spiky balls.” dies-Lauren
“It’s a paingwonian.”
"Dev did good deed"
“Mommy? Daddy? Sexual partner?”
"Spoon, speed, thunk"
"I don't wanna drink no mannequin juice!"
"I'm not going to smoke, motherfucker!"
"Are you sure it's not 'cause I'm pretty? Come on, have you seen me?"
"You know what I just realized? We get free Harry Potter wands now."
"What?! You should have permission! You SHOULD! YOU SHOULD! ....OH...I didn't set that up..."
"Goo goo ga ga"
"sometimes I regret the things that come out of my mouth"
"I'm very much shitting myself right now"
MY BRAIN SLEEPY< I MEANT HYPE
“I don’t wanna try yellow queso. And it’s partly because… I’m racist.”
"I am a onesie"
“Stop trying to fuck my car”
“Yabba-dabba-don’t.”
"Fucking plastic fishes. That's what saved our lives."
"if my friend jumps off a bridge, its probably because i pushed them"
“That’s the hole you wanna be in.”
“Click it or ticket motherfucker.”
"She wants me to become her lead so badly"
“Aw, I was gonna vomit on you.”
“Why are you black??”
"Grapple me, mothafucka."
Says in derpy "I got my accordion, im happyy."
"The accordion wants you!"
"Despite their being no shamper--...shamper...jesus christ."
"But he likes me! I'm pretty!"
Says scaredly, "Maybe we can re-attach it?"
"STFU Mishima, you're supposed to be dead. You go back in your little 6 foot hole."
"Oh god her face....it looks like she's trying to take a shit."
"You know what I'm mad about? They didn't give him his damn cigar."
"Is that the smell of burned flesh? Lets goo"
"Let's go I'm inferior--wait.."
"Skillfully? Wdym skillfully? How do you skillfully do a mannequin?"
“Everything’s legal if you consent.”
"you had your daily dose of alyssa so you good for a couple hours"
"impulsive thoughts are the bestest thoughts"
"imagine getting hit in the face with a sock full of chalk"
“Bitch, I will get a band.”
"I swear I'm not gay" - to reagan
"I like that im on top"
“I shouldn’t have fucked that.”
“That’s bippity-boppity-bullshit!!”
“I wanna fuck blue this time.”
"I never thought I'd be edged in UNO"
"I am depression, depression is life"
“McCunt?!?!?!?! I’m sorry but what kind of McDonald’s ARE YOU going to?”
"Putting on these gloves feels like putting a condom on AFTER sex"
"I'm gonna make everyone up in here uncomfortable"
“ The fact that I used to live in Alabama makes that 10x funnier.”
"You are now in hillbilly heaven"
"I don't like dark.... I'm not racist I swear"
“I’m not into boxes I swear. I’m a box virgin.”
“Fuck you poblano…”
“Fucking fold like you’re playing poker bitch.”
“I don’t like chunk.”
“He’s turrets without the turrets.”
“I got the demon adhd in me.”
“I’ll drop you like I was dropped on my head as a baby.”
“Go pelican pointe your ass somewhere else.”
"Yall friends with anal benefits"
" I want all the ditto"
“I’m funny because I’m fucked up.”
"Let's go! I'm priceless AND annoying!"
“Dipshit Kenny.”
"I put five dollars in you, you should be fine"
“I’m your criminal mind now bitch!!”
*at work, while on speaker phone at a hospital* "FUCK YOU TWINK"
"Of course man, I'm racist as fuck"
“I’m a walking sexual harassment.”
“Instead of dating a person I’ll date a burp. They like me more.”
“I’m too sad to be bullied.”
“I’m normal because of my penis! Let’s goooo!”
“I speaks the words but I don’t thinks the words.”
“If I showed you my muscles, you’d wanna fuck me.”
“Cooperate bitch!!”
"For you, baby girl, it's creamy"
“I look like a lesbian with a beard.”
"WDYM???? I WANT to touch his privates"
“I just rolled up into depression town. And I’m here to fucking stay.”
"I'm panic at the fucking disco, okay?"
“Naked gremlin.”
"My non-existent love life"
“I just wanted some chicken and now I got an Alyssa.”
"WE'RE UNMEDICATED, BITCHES!"
"Ima be smothered in sausage"
*To Reagan* "You're a peanut butter bitch"
"Swiper, yes, swiping, bitch!"
"OH MY GOD ITS A WOMEN"
“Struggle Train.”
“My arm is not for the sniffings.”
"7 minutes in heaven, in a padded room"
"I got breadanitis"
“Goddamit you deformed bitches.”
"Can't spell sushi without Sus"
"IF VIN DIESEL HAD BEEN BORN BLACK, HE WOULD HAVE BEEN VIN-IGER! EVERY WHITE PERSON WOULD HAVE A PASS BITCH"
"He loves you. He's allowed to touch your titties."
"You're blind and deaf. You're just helen kellar, thats all you is" *To Lambsy*
"Yes more, I have an enjoyable amount of stalkers... Dont judge me"
“I’m a diseased motherfucker.”
“He flashed me and he didn’t even have boobies!”
"The more and more i think about i am just a grandma... idk how to feel about it"
“Even my phone is cock blocking me.”
“Goddammit I was gay as kid….fuck!”
"He needs to learn to leave my balls alone!"
"I see balls. I attack them. Dont judge"
*Sean waves computer monitor at hui*”MAY THE POWER OF VALORANT COMPELL YOU!!”
"I need to remember not to do that when I got a hoe on my jack"
"Celiac and brownies. Just like Romeo and Juliet."
"Don't get arrested. Been there, done that, not fun."
"Steal all the whites!"
"Hello slave! Ima beat you with electric stick!"
"I'm gonna cave in on this cream."
"Kentucky fried penis."
"...spicy battery..."
"I KNEW I SAW A BITCH!!"
"See, i havent been here in a hot minute, my paleness has been absent"
"hehehe... Im a distraction :)"
"I pricked myself in beth's bush"
"I have inclusive slavery"
“That’s not gay. It’s currency.”
"Are you gonna do anything but sit there and be black?"