Derrick's Quotes
“Tic tac, thumbtack, patty whack!!”
you look like an autistic cat
“ Hey siri, how do I unautistic the autistic”
*Looking at Alyssa,* “Level infinite gyatt.”
“can you die on your own time please?”
*Talking to Alyssa,* “If I could fuck her fart, I would fuck her fart.”
*Bradon rizzes him up,* “My testicles are hard now.”
“The great awaking of the tomato baller”
“ Ass would be too fat. You would think I’m earth the way my shit curves”
“Wait can I have a gf in this?” *says to Alyssa* “yeah I’m cheating on you with Robo Bitches*
“ *swallows a lemon seed* ohno i swallowed a lemon seed im going to get pregnant! *spits it back out* abortion!”
“I’m not scared of LITTLE people! I’m just scared of how unsettling close they are to my balls”
“I would wipe the cobwebs off his balls”
“if you loved me you’d buy me a boob cake”
“Your alphabet disease is showing a lot right now.”
“Y’all clinch y’all’s purse when y’all see a man walking at night. I clinch my butt cheeks we ain’t the same”
“RESEARCH PURPOSES!? YOU HAD THREE CHILDREN WITH THAT FART SUCKING ALIEN!!”
"Lauren might be a boy anyways"
*Talking to Hagen,* “I’m gonna jerk you off under the table.”
*talking to Alyssa* “I’m your personal vibrator.”
“I love incest. It’s my favorite type of zest.”